Category Archives: Humility

Run, and Not be Weary

24 Saturday Feb 2018

Posted by in Baptism, Failure, General, Humility, Jesus Christ, Sports, Strength, Success, Trials, Weakness

≈ Leave a comment

guy down

I ran my third Marathon today. I ran another one this year after a great experience a year ago at the same event. A year ago, I was as well prepared as I could have been, and even ended up finishinig with a little gas left in my tank. My legs were tired to be sure, but I had enough left to accelerate through the finish line, and finish well ahead of where I expected to be. What a difference a year makes.

This year, I was well prepared-ish. I had run plenty, but hadn’t been able to get the long training runs in like I had in past years. The longest training run that I did complete was just 14 miles. I am learning, the hard way, that this might not cut it.

As much as I omitted the longer training sessions, and hadn’t really prepared my legs for 26.2 miles, that wasnt the main problem. The biggest, most obvious, most glaring mistake I made this year was in the nutrition department. I thought I had prepared well enough. I thought I had a good plan, but I didn’t. I thought that rather than going with the tried and true plans presented by experts, experienced runners, and people who understand exercise physiology, I would go with the Colby plan instead.

My brilliant plan consisted of nutrition powder mixes that I had been using on my not so long training runs. My foolproof plan consisted of said powder mixes of which I had neglected to even read the ingredients on the label. My innovative plan was a disaster. Lets just say we could probably rename it the “original marathon nutrition plan”. It would probably be the most accurate considering that the dude that supposedly ran the original marathon died after he “finished”.

After feeling great for about 18, or 19 miles, I suddenly realized upon gazing at my internal energy gas tank, that it was completely empty. Not like almost empty, or dinging that little warning light that reminds us to refuel soon empty, but sputtering, and spattering, and metal grinding, and engine stopping empty. I was toast.

That was no bueno. I was 7 or 8 miles short of the finish line, with only a few more water stations between where I was, and the promised land. I was in trouble. I was hoping for one of those stations to have some of those sugary goo things, or chews, or pizza, or even cooked vegetables, I was that empty. But, as luck would have it, none of the next few did. It was water, gatorade, or some tasty advil.

I was in survival mode. My legs felt more like the rusty hinges on the Tin Man in the Wizard of Oz than something that would carry me the next several miles. The reason? I really was out of gas. The powder mixes that were my main source of energy had exactly 0 calories each. Even though I had mixed 3 of them over the race, if you do the math, that’s 0 calories in, and about 3500 calories out during that almost 4 hour run. No wonder I felt so awesome.

With only about 2 and half miles left, I did run past some people handing out little honey sticks, that I promptly grabbed, and voraciously tried to suck out the 4 drops of honey. I think I may have aspirated some in my lungs I was in such a hurry. I also stole a piece of banana bread from one of the volunteer tables that was off limits. But, at that point, I was more like gollum devouring a raw fish after 7 days without food, than an actual runner.

Even with the honey, and the bread, my tank was beyond empty, it was on negative empty, if there is such a thing. It would take more than some honey drops and a stolen piece of bread to get me back to normal. The last 8 miles had been the definition of enduring to the end.

But, apparently, this is just the way that I learn best. The hard way. I had learned that nutrition was important, I had even worried about it, and planned it out meticulously in the past, but not today. I had taken it for granted. I had relied upon my own planning, and didn’t give enough thought or attention to it. In my prideful mind, I had thought, “Ive done this before, no big deal” even though, before, I had taken much better care in being really prepared by being well nourished.

As with all of the things I learn, there are parallels, and types, and comparisons that cover all aspects of my life. Truth is truth, and principles are principles. Being well nourished during a race is essential to helping me endure for the entire duration. This is as true for my physical body as it is for my spiritual side.

In the Book of Mormon we learn about the real race we are all running, and how we need help finishing. This real race consists of all of us winding our way back home to God. This race begins with our committment to run! That comittment to run is our baptism. What follows that committment is a life full of hills, long stretches without water, and others seemingly more expert at running than we are. But, the instructions on how to finish this more important race, are right at our fingertips….

“And after they had been received unto baptism, and were wrought upon and cleansed by the power of the Holy Ghost, they were numbered among the people of the church of Christ; and their names were taken, that they might be remembered and nourished by the good word of God, to keep them in the right way, to keep them continually watchful unto prayer, relying alone upon the merits of Christ, who was the author and the finisher of their faith.”
-Moroni 6:4

“Wherefore, ye must press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men. Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and endure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father: Ye shall have eternal life.”
-2 Nephi 31:20

No matter our race, we need nutrition and nourishment. Whether it be enduring a marathon, or in real life. In a physical race, we need food, or energy to keep us going. In our spiritual races, we need spiritual energy that comes from beign nourished by the word of God, and feasting upon them.

We can’t always wait until our tank is empty before we even start to think about refilling it. The effect of neglecting physical or spiritual nutrition is the same. We run out of gas. We simply cannot expect to finish the way we want to, in either race, unless we stop thinking that our own plan is best. We have to give up thinking that our own plan is foolproof, or that any success we have had in the past was because of our own strength. The simple truth of the matter is that we will always finish best when we rely solely on the One true Expert- the “Author and Finisher of our faith”

Entropy

29 Tuesday Aug 2017

Posted by in Agency, atonement, Faith, General, Humility, Jesus Christ, Pride, Strength

≈ 1 Comment

Fat_Cartoon_Man

It can get really hot in Arizona. Especially in the summertime. Not really news to anyone, just a basic fact, but somehow living in this desert gives you a better appreciation for how draining this hot can be. In the Arizona summer, as we open a door to go outside, it can literally become indistinguishable from opening up the oven to take a nice up-close look at baking cookies. No sane person would ever consider actually living in an oven, even with delicious cookies. So, for good reason, not a lot of outdoor activities are done here in the months of June-September. There is a reason why summer golf in Phoenix is so cheap.

Because of this temperature challenge, my stay-in-shape training has taken a back seat. I had been on a pretty good regimen while training to get ready for some simple triathlons over this last year. It was nice, almost perfect all throughout the winter, and up until my last race in St. George, Utah last May. After that, it got hot. Really hot. Arizona hot. I remember texting a picture of the dashboard temperature gauge to Riley one afternoon when it read 126℉. I nearly suffered 2nd degree burns just by putting my hands on the steering wheel that afternoon.

IMG_8650

The problem with summers here, is that no matter what time of day or night, it feels like the inside of a toaster. “Why don’t you just swim in the pool during the summer?” you might ask. Well, that is a great idea right up until you jump in the pool, and instead of instant coolness, refreshment, and bliss, it feels like an overheated hot tub under a fast-food heat lamp. Instead of achieving solace from the scorching rays while floating through the water, it feels more like you are a piece of meat slow roasting in the crock pot. You don’t last too long swimming when the mist coming off the pool isn’t really mist, its more like steam arising from a pot of boiling water.

And that’s not all.

You may think, “Well, if you cant run or swim outside during the summer, maybe the bike would be better?”. “Maybe the wind blowing over you as you pick up speed would cool you down as you ride?” Yes, that would be a great idea, and, yes, there is a nice wind that is created, but it feels more like a industrial sized blowdryer set right at your face. So, needless to say doing any physical activity outside of scrambling from one air conditioned building to the next, is almost out of the question.

So, long story short, I took a bit of a break. The funny, not so funny part of that break, is that after the temperature “cooled” down to around 90℉ at 10:00 pm, and I started to try and train again, I noticed that because of my self-imposed break to wait out the summer fires of Hades, I had become out of shape. It was the consequence of inactivity.

Instead of running several miles and feeling great, I was lucky not to quit after just 1. It was almost like I had to start over. All the benefits of the months, and months of training had seemingly melted away just like an ice cube on Arizona asphalt. I felt like I had reverted all the way back to square one. I guess walking from Splash Mountain to Pirates of the Caribbean isn’t adequate triathlon training.

This has been a painful reminder that our fitness or “in-shapeness” really is something that is constantly changing, for better or worse. It never really is static. Just when we get comfortable, content, and happy with where, or how we are, we relax. And this little relaxation is when we start to slip. It requires constant, consistent, and repeated work to maintain ourselves with where we want to be. If you aren’t going forward, you’re going backward. And that is exactly what had happened with me.

As I was further contemplating my physical regression after just a few weeks, I realized that I was living out a vocabulary word that I had recently rediscovered in a Sunday School class. The word was “Entropy”.

This word is a shortened idea of a more sophisticated physics law known as the 2nd law of thermodynamics. I wont even pretend to be a physics guru, or attempt to explain the intricate details of closed and open systems, energy, or its predecessor the 1st law of thermodynamics. But, it has a simple definition. The one that fits the best in this case is….

“a process of degradation or running down or a trend to disorder”.

That is just a fancy way of saying that everything is constantly wearing down. Its kind of like rusting. Everything is becoming less orderly, and unless we put energy into reversing that natural process, it will take its toll, and we will digress, regress, and lose all the progress and order that we have achieved.

So, my “in-shapeness” had degraded, devolved, and definitely trended towards disorder. In even simpler more personal terms…

Unless I keep training to stay in shape, I become more out of shape.

Unless I put energy into improving, I get worse.

Unless I continue learning, I forget what I had learned.

The process is universal, and applies to all sorts of things. This concept may even be the most valid in a spiritual sense. This degradation can happen to each of us in our lives. There are times when we are in great spiritual shape, and we have been “training” hard, working on getting better every single day. During these times, we continuously work to build up endurance, feel strong, and healthy. Then, inevitably, there are the other times when we take some time off to rest a bit, and then, before we know it, we are feeling like are running around with a plastic bag over our heads.

King Benjamin knew all about this concept of spiritual entropy. He simply described it using different words. He understood that each of us needed to work continuously to become more like our Father in Heaven. It was something that doesn’t just happen naturally. In fact, it was the “natural” part that we had to fight. It is human nature to oppose God. It is human nature to only think of ourselves, and to drift constantly away from God, his plan, and his laws. It is human nature to be selfish, greedy, and secular. King Benjamin described this condition perfectly in the Book of Mosiah…

“For the natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the fall of Adam, and will be, forever and ever, unless he yields to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord, and becometh as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father.” -Mosiah 3:19

But, just as I needed to get back into shape by working constantly, continuously, and repeatedly, King Benjamin explains exactly how we can fight the natural man, or spiritual entropy and stay in spiritual shape. He specifically singled out several words or phrases that can act as our workout list.

First, he said we must “..yield to the enticings of the Holy Spirit…” This is tough in todays world. We need to listen. Not just hear. My wife has been trying to teach me this concept for 18 years. I must be a very natural man, because she still has to constantly remind me of this. Yielding means to allow the Spirit to work in us, to allow someone else to drive, to let the spirit guide us rather than depend on our own supposed knowledge. We don’t always have to be in charge, or know everything because, “His thoughts are higher than our thoughts” -Isaiah 55:9

Second, King Benjamin teaches that we need to become a “Saint”. Becoming a Saint is to be associated with, and bear upon ourselves the name of Jesus Christ. This entails, or necessitates, using the Atonement of Jesus Christ. It is only through his atonement that we can become something “unnatural” or improved. It is by utilizing his atonement that we become something better than we thought we could be. And, the only way that this is even possible, is to work on developing the character traits that King Benjamin lists in the same verse. These required traits are, “becoming as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient”, and being “full of love”. -Mosiah 3:19

These traits do not occur naturally. They must be developed. They need to be practiced. Just like running a marathon, or swimming 2 miles in the ocean, or riding a bike for 6 hours straight. We are not born with these traits. We cant just decide to be an ironman on Monday and race in the Kona World Championships on Sunday. They must be learned. They must be developed. We all have the potential to do these things, or become these things, but we need to work at them constantly and continuously. We need to practice, and we need the atonement of Jesus Christ.

Each of us needs to fight this entropy all day, everyday. There is a perfect phrase used in the Doctrine and Covenants that teaches us the best way to start, and keep going in our own spiritual exercise regimen.

“Verily I say, men should be anxiously engaged in a good cause, and do many things of their own free will, and bring to pass much righteousness;” -Doctrine and Covenants 58:27

As we try our best to be anxiously engaged to do good around us, to be happy, to be kind, to look at people in a more loving, forgiving way, to look at life through a gospel lens, we will slowly be changing our character. We will be slowly getting in better spiritual shape. We will be fighting the “natural man”, and spiritual entropy. If we combine these efforts with a steady dose of the cleansing and enabling power of the Atonement of the Savior, we can be who we want to be, and stand on the highest podium at the end of our mortal race.

Nature’s Entropy

Our hearts and minds continually,
Are pulled by nature’s entropy,
Unfocused, dimmed, erroneously,
To earth, and not to Heav’n.

But, if we struggle faithfully,
And look up, kneeling, pleadingly,
And seek forgiveness constantly,
Our flaws can be forgiv’n.

And if we then walk steadily,
And try to live more righteously-
More loving, and more honestly,
A spark of Faith begins-

In Him, who suffered willfully,
So we can look up hopefully,
To see his hands spread willingly,
to bring us home again.

Learn to Lose

05 Sunday Mar 2017

Posted by in atonement, Failure, General, Humility, Weakness

≈ Leave a comment

 

jake

Over the last few weeks, my four-year-old son has discovered the amazing sport of baseball.  He has a giant blue plastic bat, and a few oversize whiffle balls (if the neighbors have thrown some back over the wall).

Every day after I get home from work, he comes and asks to go out in the back yard and play “hit ball”. It does sound a bit like what Tarzan might call it, but, it is indeed baseball. He loves it. There is only one slight problem. He’s not used to, nor does he enjoy, losing.

It’s the same story in every aspect of his little guy’s mind. He always has to be first. He has to win, or he acts like someone is trying to pluck out his fingernails with a pair of pliers. He has to be the first one back in the house when we get back from a car ride anywhere. He has to be first back home after a bike ride. He has to be first to finish his cereal. He has to be first to buckle his seatbelt. Everything is a make shift competition. Unfortunately, this little quirk that seems to drive his every action, somehow does not apply to bedtime. He’s happy to drag his feet then.

So, we as a family have had to make a decision. Do we let him always win these little perceived competitions? Or do we deal with the dramatic weeping, wailing, and gnashing of teeth, of a four-year-old 2nd place finish? Seeing how he is child #4, and we as parents are now nearly beaten into submission, he tends to “win” so we can keep the peace, our hair, and our sanity.

But, I guess the game of baseball has given me another chance to teach him a valuable lesson….How to lose.

The first couple of days when he would get tagged out, he would get that super frowny cry-face that kids can get. He acted like you just stole his ice cream cone from his hand and ate it in front of him. He’d start to cry, whine and complain while skulking off into the shrubs to try and elicit pity and sympathy from everyone around him.

Its a hard lesson for a four-year-old. And sometimes, it can be a hard lesson for a 38 year-old.

Getting out is part of baseball. Striking out is part of baseball. Failing is part of baseball. In fact, getting a hit only 3 or 4 times out of 10 up to the plate is considered hugely successful! The earlier my little four-year-old can grasp and understand that, the better. The sooner that the rest of us old people can understand that life also works in much the same way, the better.

We are here on this earth to struggle. To lose. We aren’t here to win every time, get a trophy and go home to our Heavenly Father with nothing but blue 1st place ribbons draped around our necks. We aren’t here to return home to Heaven having never tasted anything bitter, never felt loss, heartache, disappointment, pain, anguish, anxiety, inadequacy, or discomfort.

In fact, its quite the opposite. We are here to experience exactly all of those things. We need to learn to lose.

When we are allowed to lose, struggle and fail, we increase the spectrum of feelings we have experienced. Only with the lowest lows, can we then be able to savor the experience of winning, overcoming, and succeeding in a much more meaningful way. How much better is that slow trot around the bases after a home run, when our previous 3 at bats were strikeouts?

When we struggle, or face a fight we just cant seem to win, sometimes we just need a new perspective. For me, the perfect pep talk comes from Moroni. When I feel knee deep in the middle of slump, or when I feel like I am 0 for my last 50 at bats, he provides the best reality check there is. He uses the Lord’s words to explain the origin, source, or reason for our weakness and struggle.

“And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them.”   -Ether 12:27

It is interesting to me that the Lord, in this scripture, teaches us that it is He himself that gives us our weaknesses. Our weaknesses and struggles are not heaped upon us by a malicious adversary. They are lovingly placed upon us by our Savior in order to mold us into what he wants us to become- humble and submissive. He wants us to depend on Him. And, if we do humble ourselves and have faith in him, our weaknesses not only vanish, but become strengths.

If the Savior is the one who places these weaknesses upon us, then He is certainly willing and capable of removing them. His master plan includes struggles, and burdens, and it always has. But, it is always for a wise purpose. It can bring us closer to Him.

“And I will also ease the burdens which are put upon your shoulders, that even you cannot feel them upon your backs, even while you are in bondage; and this will I do that ye may stand as witnesses for me hereafter, and that ye may know of a surety that I, the Lord God, do visit my people in their afflictions.”  Mosiah 24:14

his-yoke-is-easy-banner

Losing is part of life. Struggling is part of life. But, we can’t get discouraged. We have to realize and recognize that those obstacles or weaknesses we struggle with are actually placed there by our loving Savior. We have to try and see these big obstacles in our way not as stumbling blocks to hamper our progress, but as stepping stones to promote it. 

Debbie vs Reba and the Rad Fads that Ended Up Bad

26 Tuesday Jul 2016

Posted by in Brothers, General, Humility, Music, Pride

≈ Leave a comment

 

SAMSUNG DIGITAL CAMERA

This is a pretty close representation of Dad’s boom box

When Tyson and I were growing up, everything was a competition. Everything. Among the things we “competed” or fought over were super important things like, who could have the most posters covering the walls of our room, who had the best haircut (mullet vs rat-tail, side-spike vs steps), who would win in 21 tip in, who could eat faster (this was really for 2nd place as Casey was the clear champion here), Ryne Sandberg vs Andre Dawson, and on and on and on. All of this was also compounded by the fact that we shared a room.

Looking back its pretty funny, but one of the more ridiculous things we fought over was our Dad’s old maroon boombox. At that time, it was state of the art. It had dual cassette decks, stereo surround, and a bunch of equalizer buttons. We basically just confiscated it, and hoarded it away in our room to listen to our favorite music.

The daily fight and struggle was over who had the right to listen to who’s music at night as we were falling asleep. This is a sibling battle that may be foreign to all those who never shared a room growing up. But for us, we had to survive those nights when our musical choice had to be put on hold, while we suffered the torture of the other’s music until we fell asleep.

The thing that makes this hilarious is the music we chose. Back in the late 80’s, and early 90’s music was a lot different. Stuff that was cool then, isn’t exactly cool now. Stuff that was perfectly normal listening material to us then, just cracks us up now. To this day, we make fun of each other’s previous childhood musical choices. The beauty of this memory from that particular competition, is that we were both losers.

My personal choice of music varied nightly, but one song, on one tape, has become fodder for Tyson razzing me. It’s a song called “Gonna Love Ya (till the cows come home)” by Reba Macintyre. I know, I know, don’t say anything. I’ve heard it for like 25 years straight now. Trust me. I know. But, just in case you were wondering about that song, here it is…

 

Tyson, on the other hand, was a bit more eclectic in his choices. He was also a bit more current, and sappy than me. He was also maybe even a little bit “chic flicky”. So, his choice that earned his 25 years of my counter-razzing was, “Lost in Your Eyes” by Debbie Gibson. If you still have room in your doggy bag, here it is…

 

Now you can clearly understand why we both lost the competition. It was really more like choosing between a colonoscopy and a root canal.

The funniest thing about all this is that we were both supposedly big tough macho guys, and every night, we would argue and fight, nearly coming to blows, over listening to Debbie Gibson or Reba Macyntire! If we had a time machine, we’d probably have to both go back and slap ourselves. But it is hilarious now.

Isn’t it interesting how time changes everything? What is “cool” and “popular” changes. Shows like MacGuyver, and Knight Rider, the best things ever in their time, are now filed away in the “Man, I can’t believe I watched that, this is so lame” category right next to the files for pegged pants, L.A. Gear shoes, and big hair bands. But, such is the way of popular culture. It is always moving on, moving constantly to the next big thing, the next fad, style, sound, or whatever, but the only thing that remains constant is that nothing lasts.

These popular fads don’t ever last because their content isn’t lasting. It’s not even meant to be. People get tired of them because they don’t satisfy the demands of real happiness.  Fads have a shelf life of mere moments. Look what happened to the Titanic song by Celine Dion. In its day, it was played on the radio every 3 minutes all over the world and people still couldn’t hear it enough. But now, Its probably on the top 5 list of reasons why people want to pluck their eyes out.

If we look only to things like Debbie Gibson, or songs about cows to make us happy forever, we will only be disappointed (other than maybe laughing at ourselves 25 years later). Real, true happiness that lasts through changing societies, peoples, cultures, and traditions only comes through obedience to God’s laws. And these fortunately don’t change.

“For do we not read that God is the same yesterday, today, and forever, and in him there is no variableness neither shadow of changing?”

-Mormon 9:9

“…I give unto you directions how you may act before me, that it may turn to you for your salvation. I, the Lord, am bound when ye do what I say; but when ye do not what I say, ye have no promise.

-Doctrine and Covenants 82:9,10

God will not change. His laws will not change. The blessings he pours upon us when we follow his commandments also will not change. They last forever. It is reliable, dependable, lasting and true. We can count on it 100%. Its like a #1 hit song that stays #1 forever.

Its so much easier to play the game, when the out of bounds lines aren’t constantly shifting and changing. When the laws or rules that bring us happiness are constant, dependable, and solid, we know exactly where to look to find and achieve real lasting happiness. Contrast this with following popular culture and its ever shifting views, beliefs, and so-called values. When we follow what is popular, we soon feel like we have one foot on a hover board, and the other on a banana peel.

This ever changing popular culture will try to lure us into the “better ideas” of what will make us happy. We may think, “that particular commandment is outdated, and doesn’t really apply today because…”, or, “I’m good with all of the commandments, except the one that…”, or, “The church needs to…”  Remember, when we think that we have a better idea than God, there is a good chance (like 100%) we are wrong.

Many, many people, have thought their ideas were better. Namely, Pharoah when he butted heads with Moses, Goliath and the Philistines, the false priests of Baal, Laman, Lemuel, Laban, and basically the whole world not in Noah’s family boat. Im not sure if anyone is actually keeping score, but God is undefeated. It may be a good idea to be on his team. We aren’t always as smart as we think we are.

The Lord specifically warned us about ourselves and this manner of thinking in the Book of Mormon…

“O that cunning plan of the evil one! O the vainness, and the frailties, and the foolishness of men! When they are learned they think they are wise, and they hearken not unto the counsel of God, for they set it aside, supposing they know of themselves, wherefore, their wisdom is foolishness and it profiteth them not. And they shall perish. But to be learned is good if they hearken unto the counsels of God.”

-2 Nephi 9:28,29

It may seem complicated to navigate through our everyday lives and deal with all the changing standards that the world seems to hold us to.  What words we can use, what is offensive, what isn’t, what is normal, what isn’t, and so on. And, if we try and figure out the world’s standards, we will be confused, because they change almost as quickly as they are established. But, if we just hold ourselves up against God’s standard, it becomes super simple. After all, we are all participating in his plan, not ours. He even left us specific instructions that even a 3 year old can understand.

In fact, if we think about it, the mind-bending big questions that world famous philosophers from the beginning of time have contemplated over, argued about, and postulated opinions on, come down to…

Who are we?

Why are we here?

Where did we come from?

Where do we go when we die?

God made his plan so simple, that the smallest primary children can answer these age old questions as soon as they can talk, or sing….

I am a child of God,
And He has sent me here,
Has given me an earthly home
With Parents kind and dear.

Lead me, guide me, walk beside me
Help me find the way,
Teach me all that I must do
To live with him someday.

I am a child of God,
Rich blessings are in store;
If I but learn to do his will,
I’ll live with him once more

I am a child of God
His promises are sure;
Celestial glory shall be mine
If I can but endure

If we follow the instructions that our loving Heavenly Father left us in the words of this simple song, we will find real, lasting happiness not only in our lives here on this earth, but also in our future lives yet to come. When we look at the reasons why we are here on this earth from the proper perspective, isn’t this the #1 hit song that should be #1 forever?

Ebenezer Scrooge and Ukuleles

12 Sunday Jun 2016

Posted by in General, Humility, Power, Treasure

≈ 2 Comments

eddievedderukepublicityphoto

A while ago, one of our readers, lets call him “Ben” to protect his anonymity, brought to our attention a really cool moment in the Book of Mormon. He wanted to get our 4 perspectives on it. He had noticed that the Father of King Lamoni was only willing to give up “half” his kingdom to save his own mortal life even when Ammon had him at swordpoint after defending King Lamoni and himself from his attacks (Alma 20). But, later, when in his own home, and after Ammon’s brother, Aaron, had taught him the principles of the gospel, he was willing to give “all” he had to know God, and save his spiritual life (Alma 22).

Tyson was the first to respond and opine on this subject, and we read about it HERE.

For my take, I will go a little different route, and use some references that probably wouldn’t make it in a Sunday school lesson, but perfectly illustrate the principle that I take away from the story of the Father of King Lamoni. The references I’m talking about just happen to be the lyrics from a Pearl Jam song.

Before I lose anybody, I will just say that Pearl Jam music is not always an uplifting positive thing. Im not claiming that it is, but if Donald Duck, Donuts, ski boots, and burning pianos can teach us, then Pearl Jam can definitely make a small contribution to this blog, and can help teach a gospel principle. If it makes anyone feel better, this song wasn’t anything crazy, just Eddie Vedder singing with a Ukulele, so there’s that. I guess this is where I include the caveat that even a blind squirrel finds a nut in the forest every once in a while, or even a broken clock is right twice a day… etc. etc.

The few lines of lyrics that will start us off come from a song called “Soon Forget”. The song describes a man who is obsessed with money. His only love in life is fancy cars and giant houses, and never takes any time to concentrate on anything else. He grows old, clings to his 100 dollar bills, and fades away into obscurity and eventually dies. No one remembers him, or his money. No one even bats an eye when he passes. He hadn’t taken any time to develop personal relationships, or give any time to the true and lasting things that really matter. Even though he had money and supposed power, he was forgettable. He was just like Ebenezer Scrooge without the change of heart. Here are some of the lines from the song.

 

Sorry is the fool who trades his soul for a Corvette 
Thinks he’ll get the girl, he’ll only get the mechanic 
What’s missing? He’s living a day he’ll soon forget

Counts his money every morning, the only thing that keeps him [going]
Locked in a giant house, that’s alarming 
The townsfolk, they all laugh

Sorry is the fool who trades his love for hi-rise rent 
Seems the more you make equals the loneliness you get 
And it’s fitting, he’s barely living a day he’ll soon forget

That’s one more time around, and there is not a sound 
He’s lying dead, clutching Benjamins, never put the money down 
He’s stiffening, we’re all whistling, a man we’ll soon forget

 

Sounds like Ebenezer doesn’t it? This is what I imagine when I read the story of the Father of Lamoni. He was not only a King, but THE King. He had many kingdoms, His son Lamoni was also a king, but still subject to his powerful Father. In my mind, he was not unlike the man in the song. He had money, power, and spent his time celebrating lavishly. That is what was important to him. After all, it was his son’s absence at one of his big time feasts that upset Lamoni’s Father in the first place¹.

Imagine a king that is used to getting his way 100% of the time. He has everything he could possibly want- Money, power, land, subjects, and was probably not used to anyone challenging him- Not even his own son, who was also a king. He didn’t want for, or need anything. Nothing at all. He didn’t depend on any help from anyone. Especially his Father in Heaven.

These types of people usually aren’t exactly humble. Arrogant and prideful is probably a better description. His word was final. No questions. His view of himself was likely dependent on the power he had. His identity was dependent on his wealth, and influence. If his worldly possessions were to be lost, taken, or destroyed, he would, in essence, cease to be who he was. He was his stuff.

This thought is evidenced by the words he spoke against Ammon. He argued against Ammon to his son and said, “Lamoni, thou art going to deliver these Nephites, who are sons of a liar. Behold, he robbed our fathers; and now his children are also come amongst us that they may, by their cunning and their lyings, deceive us, that they again may rob us of our property²” He emphasized everything in terms of robbing property. Stuff. Thats all he was worried about. If we look at him this way, is it any wonder that when he was up against it, and Ammon had a sword on him, that he only offered half of his kingdom? In his mind, if he lost all he possessed, He, as he saw himself, would be dead anyway because his stuff would be gone.

But, lets fast forward to after he had been taught and understood a new fuller perspective. He had been amazed that Ammon, a Nephite, an enemy, a challenger, had refused to take half of his kingdom. Not only that, but all he wanted was for his companions to be released from prison, and for his new friend King Lamoni to retain his kingdom, and that he (the Father of King Lamoni) would not be displeased with him (King Lamoni).

How surprising must that have been to a man who sees stuff as the only important thing in the world? He probably had a Ebeneezer Scrooge moment right then and there. He must have thought about that continuously until Aaron came and taught him gospel, and further explained the reasons behind why Ammon had done what he had done, and said what he had said.

Only after a new perspective was taught to King Lamoni’s Father, did he see that the worldly wealth, power, and influence that he possessed could not bring him the one thing that all of us want- to be happy. Only after his eyes were really opened did he offer everything that he had. He had tasted the one thing that he knew he lacked, the one thing that money couldn’t buy. Happiness. True, lasting, eternal happiness and joy.

When Aaron taught him the gospel, Im sure he felt it. The spirit testifies of truth and he got a little taste of the real joy that comes through obedience to the gospel, and he wanted it. At any cost. The record says that, “…Aaron did expound unto him the scriptures from the creation of Adam, laying the fall of man before him, and their carnal state and also the plan of redemption, which was prepared from the foundation of the world, through Christ, for all whosoever would believe on his name³.” It probably isn’t that big of a stretch to think that he may have read him the words of Jacob, “Adam fell that men might be; and men are, that they might have joy4.”

Soon after Aaron finished teaching him, the father of King Lamoni understood. He understood what he had been missing, even though he had everything. This is what he said, “What shall I do that I may have this eternal life of which thou hast spoken? Yea, what shall I do that I may be born of God, having this wicked spirit rooted out of my breast, and receive his Spirit, that I may be filled with joy, that I may not be cast off at the last day? Behold, said he, I will give up all that I possess, yea, I will forsake my kingdom, that I may receive this great joy5.”

He was now willing to give up, freely (without a sword up to his neck), everything he had to know the joy of the gospel. Remember, he had viewed himself and his worth as being dependent on his possessions. His stuff. He was now willing to part with everything that he thought he WAS, in order to BE something new. He had an eternal perspective. And that was worth far more than anything he could possess.

We all could use a little more eternal perspective, and loosen our grip on the worldly things we possess or work for. The joy we all seek is only found when we give up those parts of us that are stuck in the world, and we let go. Real happiness only comes when we are willingly obedient to our Heavenly Father and His Son. It may be as simple as wanting our treasure to be in heavenly currency instead of earthly coins.

“And whosoever will lose his life in this world, for my sake, shall find it in the world to come6.”

 

1. Alma 20:9
2. Alma 20:13
3. Alma 22:13
4. 2 Nephi 2:25
5. Alma 22:15
6. JST Mathew 16:28

The Master of Ocean and Earth and Skies

26 Thursday May 2016

Posted by in Battle, Divinity, Example, General, Humility, Jesus Christ, Joseph Smith, Loyalty, Obedience, Opposition, Optimism, Patience, Power, Pride, Prophets, Strength, Success, Weakness, Weather

≈ Leave a comment

Washington

Everyday life is full of gospel lessons. They are everywhere. You just have to look for them.  Who would have ever thought that even Saturday morning cartoons could teach us about the Savior and His power! Yes, even Donald Duck can teach us.

I want to share a certain scripture and then go on to explain how the lesson in this scripture can be shown in a Donald Duck cartoon, and then how it came to life in another powerful way in the late 1700’s.  It will be a bit like Bill and Ted’s excellent gospel adventure. Hang on.

The scripture is in Luke. Chapter 8 verse 25. This is Jesus and his desciples speaking in a boat. Jesus had just calmed the angry seas during a sudden storm on their way across a certain lake, simply by commanding them to be still…

“And he said unto them, Where is your faith? And they being afraid wondered, saying one to another, What manner of man is this! For he commandeth even the winds and water, and they obey him”?

This is the same story that inspired the Hymn “Master, the Tempest is Raging”. The lyrics are a perfect set up for the rest of this post. Especially the part about the late 1700’s. Here is the second verse,  and the chorus…

Master, with anguish of spirit
I bow in my grief today.
The depths of my sad heart are troubled.
Oh, waken and save, I pray!
Torrents of sin and of anguish
Sweep o’er my sinking soul,
And I perish! I perish! dear Master.
Oh, hasten and take control!

The winds and the waves shall obey thy will:
Peace, be still.
Whether the wrath of the storm-tossed sea
Or demons or men or whatever it be,
No waters can swallow the ship where lies
The Master of ocean and earth and skies.
They all shall sweetly obey thy will:
Peace, be still; peace, be still.
They all shall sweetly obey thy will:
Peace, peace, be still.

The cool part of the story and the hymn, is that we learn that the Savior has power over everything! Including the winds, water, weather, and all the elements. We learn the same lesson in the Book of Mormon when Lehi and Nephi are crossing the ocean, and Laman and Lemuel tie Nephi up so they can have their little dance party. Only by repenting, releasing Nephi, and a subsequent petition sent to the Master of earth and skies, does the storm cease! The weather is controlled by the Lord!

Now, back to Saturday morning cartoons. In this next little clip, Donald learns all about this same principle. Sometimes the weather does funny things. Things that don’t exactly make sense. It can be sunny one second, and rainy the next. Check this out…..

Donald Duck learns the hard way that weather can only be controlled by the Lord! Normal men cannot be blamed, nor take the credit for good, or bad weather! Its God’s little way of making sure that He alone is responsible for it. When He doesn’t want you to go golfing in sunny weather, you don’t go!

Now, lets rewind to the year 1776. General George Washington had picked a fight with the largest most powerful Army/Navy/Military in the world at the time. Great Britain. He’s got a bunch of volunteer farmers fighting for him, who aren’t exactly striking fear into the British. The odds are that the “war” will be over in about 10 minutes, it was like Mike Tyson vs Steve Urkel.  The Rebel soldiers had no chance. They weren’t as well trained, well equipped, or as numerous. The one thing they did have on their side, however, was the Master of Ocean and Earth and Skies! This is how He played his part….

Example 1. The Battle of Dorchester heights. This little battle was just outside of Boston. The British had taken control of the port city, and Washington and his little army was just outside wondering what on earth they could possibly do to fight and not get blown away.  One of Washington’s colonels, Henry Knox, had heard that way over in New Jersey the Americans had captured some Cannons and supplies, and that if he could go see if he could get them to Boston, They might have a chance. Washington sent him off, and a few months later, Henry Knox returned with 120,000 pounds of morters and cannon. But here is where the details of the story go right along with Donald Duck. After getting to Fort Ticonderoga where the Cannons had been taken, he built sleds to transport them back to Boston, although no snow was on the ground. That took faith. He then waited several days, until Christmas Day, when a blizzard hit, and the Hudson river froze over, allowing for easy crossing. By January 1776 his delivery was made. The customized weather allowed the quick transport all the way back to Boston. But, that wasn’t all. More heavenly weather would come!

Henry_Knox_by_Peale

Henry Knox

The new cannon had to be sent to the top of the Hill to overlook and bomb Boston. The only problem was, if the British saw the Americans hauling cannons up the hill, they would have attacked with their huge numbers, and mopped the floor with them. So, of course, the Lord sent a heavenly haze to conceal their move up to Dorchester Heights above Boston, right in front of the British lines. Unseen. But, the Lord wasn’t done yet.

Washington now had his cannon on top of the hill, but was still way outnumbered by the British. General Howe, the British commander, then decided to send his War-boats to cross the harbor and attack Washington’s spot on the hill. But, as the British sent the boats off, the day, which had started abnormally warm and pleasant, changed by nightfall into a storm that Washington’s officers called the “hurrycane” of hail, snow, and sleet!

Two British boats were blown ashore. One American Leutenant said it was the worst storm he had ever seen.  Talk about a bad day. Just to add salt to the wound, after these divine weather interventions, there happened to be a sudden outbreak of small pox in Boston where the British troops were stationed. They had seen enough, they were just like Donald Duck trying to golf, and soon thereafter said, “peace out” and left Boston!

The British were stunned. But if we look back and examine it through gospel lenses, we see a pattern that is forming. Consider this scripture in 2 Nephi. Its describing the wealthy, powerful, and worldly. See if it fits in this context…

“And the harp, and the aviol, the tabret, and pipe, and wine are in their feasts; but they regard not the work of the Lord, neither consider the operation of his hands.”

                                                                                          -2 Nephi 15:12

Example 2. Escape from Brooklyn Heights. Washington’s tactics in the war were often just a matter of not getting wiped of the face of the earth. More like a prevent defense, or not losing, rather than going for the knockout win. One of these grand escapes was in Brooklyn. This miracle happened after Washington’s troops were surrounded and cornered on 3 sides by British soldiers, and blocked off by the East river on the 4th side. The British Navy had hundreds of ships in New York Harbor and was sending ships up the river to completely surround Washington’s troops. He had already lost 25% of his army in the previous days of fighting. It was pretty hopeless. The war would be over in those next 10 minutes. Well, not exactly. Maybe just as soon as the rain stopped pounding the area, making it impossible to keep the powder dry, or even move in the mud. No knockout attacks were possible. Weird huh? Not really, if we know who sent the rain!

For some reason, Washington decided to wait for 3 days, then, on the 3rd night, attempt a daring overnight escape. All the troops will be silently sent across the East river on small boats. The same river that the British were coming up in order to surround them.  It was supposed to be game over. The British only had one single problem. The Lord was on the American side. And, again, being all powerful, He controls the weather!

That night, an abnormal northeasterly wind picked up, preventing the British ships from being able to come up the river to cut off Washington’s escape. Then at 9 pm, the wind shifted and blew to the west to help Washington’s boats escape. When morning came, not all the troops were across yet, so, not a problem, the Lord sent a fog so thick that “no one could see a man even 6 yards away” but this fog was only on the long island side of the river, on the New York side, it was clear as a bell. As the last of the boats entered the water, the fog started to lift, and the British moved in, only to find an abandoned camp! The timing was so perfect, that the British even took a few shots at the last boats that were just out of range.

Washington’s 9000 men escaped! And just to make sure the British didn’t immediately follow and destroy them the next day, a fire broke out in the city just in time to take away the British soldiers attention.

What was it exactly that made the Americans different? Why did the Lord help them, and not the British?

Two simple reasons stand out. First, America is a covenant land. The Jaradites were lead here, the Mulekites were lead here, and the Nephites were lead here. To this land. For that reason alone, we know that “inasmuch as ye keep my commandments, ye shall prosper in the land”! The covenant stands even today. The covenant is for the land, not only the people on it.

The second reason was that Washington was not your everyday commander. He was a very religious man. He understood exactly who was ultimately in control of the outcome of the war. He knew that “Providence” was America’s only hope for victory. He demanded that his men lived virtuously. He demanded that they watched their language, that they had scripture study, and that they prayed to petition the help of the Master of ocean and earth and skies! He was just like Moroni, and Mormon. He knew that his soldiers needed to be worthy of the blessings of Heaven, or they had no chance. They were completely dependent on Him. Sound familiar? Sounds just like the people of Limhi, and the people of Ammon, and the People of Alma. History really does repeat itself.

That is why America won the war. She was led by a man who understood that God was in charge. During his inaugural address, Washington said this…

“No people can be bound to acknowledge and adore the invisible hand which conducts the affairs of men more than the people of the United States. Every step by which they have advanced to the character of an independent nation seems to have been distinguished by some token of providential agency”

Remember, the Lord needed a nation built on religious freedom in order to garner in His last dispensation of the gospel. The United States constitution was ratified and officially binding in 1788, only 17 years later, in 1805, Joseph Smith was born.

No matter how helpless the situation may seem, we can learn the lessons over and over both in the scriptures and out. Gods people will prevail. Our loyalty needs to be to Him. He will never forget them. Even when its raining! Let’s always try to be worthy to be called His People.

“And the day shall come that the earth shall rest, but before that day the heavens shall be darkened, and a veil of darkness shall cover the earth; and the heavens shall shake, and also the earth; and great tribulations shall be among the children of men, but my people will I preserve;”

-Moses 7:61

Prize Winning Humility

06 Monday Jul 2015

Posted by in Humility, Pride

≈ Leave a comment

A little while ago (in November of last year), I wrote here about humility and my absurd lack of it as a character trait.  It was such a deficiency back then that I even wrote, “I think the lack of this trait (in it’s purest and truest form) really was and still is my biggest weakness – or at least one of them”.  Combined with that (my own) realization of non-humility was a conversation I had with someone whose opinion I value that told me (in a very nice way) “you need to become acquainted with real humility.  Not just to know what it is in general terms, but to really understand it and feel it”.  So, I made a personal goal to become the most humble person ever.  I vowed that there would be nobody better at being humble than me.  I wanted to be the best at being humble.

Now it’s July, and coincidentally after quoting myself, I am happy to report that I have worked very hard on my humility over the past few months – and I think I have successfully become much more humble.  In fact, I might be eligible for the “most improved humility award”.  If nothing else, I am way more humble than I used to be.  Like…. way more.  In fact, my humility has increased to the point that I can look around and be confident that I am more humble than most of the people that I see.   I have come so far in so little time.

Then today something weird happened.  It was like someone changed the rules for acquiring humility without telling me; or at least someone tried to add something to the rulebook that wasn’t there before because what I read today was so different that it just sounded wrong.  I had spent the past several months focusing on my humility, my improvement, and my progress – including how the effects of my focus and improvement had further increased my humility – only to read that “true humility is not thinking less of yourself; it is thinking of yourself less.” 1

Because I had recently spent a lot of time thinking about myself and working on my own humility (which took a lot of time thinking less of myself), I knew that anything that told me to worry about other people in order to increase my humility must be incorrect; after all, how could worrying about or trying to solve other people’s problems help with my humility?  So, I read it again sure that I had indeed misread it the first time.  Then I read it again, and again, and again just to be sure I hadn’t suffered a mild stroke and lost the ability to comprehend sentences – because I am also a really good reader.

That was when I put 2 and 2 together to make 5 because there was no way that focusing and worrying and caring about other people, helping them with all their problems, making sure that they have everything they need, and helping them achieve all of their goals could help me at all – in fact, if I listened to that advice and spent all of my time doing things for others I wouldn’t have any time to worry about myself or work on my own humility, which means I would never improve myself or get to tell people how successful my quest for humility has been by writing a blog post.

So, in an effort to become yet even more humble, I will be spending all of my free time working individually on my own humility, because you never know when the Lord will need a super duper humble guy, and I for one want to be ready and operating at the peak level of humility for when he calls.

Notes

1 CS Lewis wrote this in Mere Christianity

A Man Among Them

05 Tuesday May 2015

Posted by in Humility, Silence

≈ Leave a comment

There are over 7.3 Billion people on earth.  Just to illustrate with an actual number, that’s more than 7,300,000,000 people living right now and each one of us is “a man among them”. 1   We have all been asked to “let our light so shine” and to “stand with brightness”. Yet, with that many people in the world, we might feel like our lights just aren’t what they need to be sometimes because even when we unite ourselves with the other 15 Million Latter-Day Saint members, we realize that 1 Million is only one-thousandth of 1 Billion.  Too often we feel like we are too small even (and maybe especially) if we live in an area with a higher concentration of members.  We may feel like we are just one person among so many or that there is no way that the Lord can use us to bring about a change – let alone a “mighty” change.

We may think or feel something like; “I am just one person, among so many, what can I do”?  If we feel that way, we are not alone.  I imagine that everyone at some point has felt that they were just “a man among them” – because that’s exactly what we are, and that’s exactly what the Lord wants us to be.

I love the story of Abinidi.  It is a popular story; one which most of us remember clearly from primary because of it’s PG-13 rating.   Yet, there is so much to this story that we don’t know yet.  We know the results of the story (his martyrdom), and the effect of his willingness (Alma’s change of heart) and we can understand why it is in the Book of Mormon.  Yet, there is something at the very beginning of the story that we should also understand.  It is in the verse in which Abinidi is introduced to the reader – which we may skip far too easily.

Chapter 11 of Mosiah explains that the kingdom was conferred from Zeniff to one of his sons (Noah), and that Noah did not walk in the ways of his father.  Verses 2-19 outline the horrible things Noah did as king to burden and tax the people and if we are observant, we will notice that the conditions of that kingdom as explained pretty much mirror the conditions in which we live today.  They also include a victorious mini-battle which contributes to Noah’s pride and boasting, which all set the stage for Abinidi.

Verse 20 reads “And it came to pass that there was a man among them whose name was Abinidi…that’s it.  That’s the extent of our introduction to one of the greatest heroes in the book of Mormon.  The Lord wouldn’t have it any other way.  We never learn, but Abinidi was very likely a simple, humble and righteous soul (probably normal in every sense of the word) who tried his best every day to live according to the principles of the gospel as ‘a man among them’.  One man among a city and community full of wicked priests, idolatrous and wicked people.  I imagine that Abinidi had vowed long before this call came from the Lord to serve in whatever capacity he was asked to fill.  I imagine that the oil of Abinidi’s lamp had been slowly filled over many years of devoted scripture study, prayer, obedience, and hard work.  I imagine that Abinidi had teachers, friends, family, and numerous struggles just like the rest of us.  Yet, when the call came  – he was ready to serve – and “he went forth among them” and did the will of the Lord.

We all know the story; the people are filled with wroth and naturally want to take away Abinidi’s life because he testified of their wickedness.  The people try to kill him, but the Lord “delivered him out of their hands” (the first time).  This put Abinidi on their hit list, and “they sought from that time forward to take him”.

I like to think that the Lord used that first assignment as a test for Abinidi to see if he would “do all things whatsoever the Lord [his] God shall command [him]”.3  It couldn’t have been easy for Abinidi to rise up and preach to the people, especially since he was “a man among them”, yet he did it.  The Lord may have also been providing some additional instruction and preparation (temporal and spiritual) to Abinidi because it’s not for two more years that he returns (disguised) and gives his amazing testimony to king Noah and his priests.  No doubt these two years consisted of fervent prayer, trust in the Lord, willingness to submit to his will that led to an unflinching willingness to seal his testimony with his life.  Abinidi’s amazing testimony, teachings, and witness is then outlined in chapters 12-16.

As humble and simple as that introduction was for Abinidi, being “a man among them”, let’s remember the amazing and “mighty” change which was the result of this testimony.  In chapter 17 (verse 2) of Mosiah we are introduced to the lone young man who “believed the words which Abinidi had spoken”.  This introduction is strikingly similar, which reads “there was one among them whose name was Alma”…

We know that this “one among them whose name was Alma” believed and acted to change his life, and the life of his posterity which blessed many people and provided us with lots of great reading material – for which we are all grateful.

Before we think that Abinidi and Alma are the only two with simple introductions, let’s remember Amulek who is introduced to the reader (when Alma came upon him) by the glorious and wordy “he said to ‘a man‘” (Alma 8:19).

We all live in a world filled to the brim with all sorts of iniquity, and we feel like we are just “one man among them”.  But, we can be patiently and humbly obeying and doing our best to be ready for when the Lord calls us to “perform a work” – whatever that work may be.  That work may only affect “one among them”, but that one has the potential to become many.   We can also help those who are in our care (children, spouses, etc.) to patiently and humbly do their best to be ready, because the Lord will call us.  Let us strive to be men and women of God, patient and humble enough, that our introduction and story can simply be “there was a man among them” named (enter your name here) who did the will of the Lord.

General Note:

In regards to emphasis as outlined in my previous post. We can also place more focus on the term ‘man’1 – especially as it causes us to ponder on what a real man or woman is.  For example, we could read it “And it came to pass that there was A MAN among them”.  This denotes that Abinidi was a true man of God2 among the people.   This thought is strengthened when read in context of John 19:5 (Behold, the man!) as that indicates the ultimate goal of true manhood.   One other thought to consider while reading these passages, is the difference between the use of son of man, and Son of Man (with capitalization).  This second usage is “A title that Jesus Christ used when speaking of himself (Luke 9:22; 21:36).  It meant the Son of Man of Holiness.  Man of Holiness is one of the names of God the Father.  When Jesus called himself the Son of Man, it was an open declaration of his divine relationship with the Father”. 3

Notes

1 I will use ‘man’ here, but do not infer any difference in characteristics between males and females, especially as it relates to righteousness.

2 See “Be Men!” by Carlos E. Asay, April 1992 (click here)

3 The Guide to the Scriptures – Son of Man

Shake it Off

28 Saturday Feb 2015

Posted by in Humility, Pride

≈ Leave a comment

So… every once in a while, I think of a gospel principle that would really help me or someone close to me.  If I am being honest, I am much from quick to judge others than I am myself.  I can see faults in others from miles away, but fail to see the exact same faults in myself.  Ironically enough, I have been thinking about forgiveness for the last few days and thinking of a couple of people that just need to let some things go, you know?  When President Uchtdorf’s talk “Lord, Is It I?” came into my remembrance.

A brief refresher:

“It was or beloved Savior’s final night in mortality, the evening before He would offer Himself a ransom for all mankind.  As He broke bread with His disciples, He said something that must have filled their hearts with great alarm and deep sadness.  “one of you shall betray me,” He told them.

The disciples didn’t question the truth of what He said.  Nor did they look around, point to someone else, and ask, “Is it him?”  Instead, “they were exceedingly sorrowful, and began every one of them to say unto Him, Lord, is it I?”

I wonder what each of us would do if we were asked that question by the Savior.  Would we look at those around us and say in our hearts, “He’s probably talking about Brother Johnson.  I’ve always wondered about him,” or “I’m glad Brother Brown is here.  He really needs to hear this message”?  Or would we, like those disciples of old, look inward and ask that penetrating question; “Is it I?”

… some are convinced that their busy schedules or unique circumstances make them exempt from the daily acts of devotion and service that would keep them close to the Spirit.

Brethren, none of us like to admit when we are drifting off the right course.  Often we try to avoid looking deeply into our souls and confronting our weaknesses, limitations, and fears.  Consequently, when we do examine our lives, we look through the filter of biases, excuses, and stories we tell ourselves in order to justify unworthy thoughts and actions.

Brethren, we must put aside our pride, see beyond our vanity, and in humility ask, “Lord, is it I?”  And if the Lord’s answer happens to be “Yes, my son, there are things you must improve, things I can help you to overcome,” I pray that we will accept this answer, humbly acknowledge our sins and shortcomings, and then change our ways by becoming better husbands, better fathers, better sons.”

– Dieter F. Uchtdorf

Why thank you for the humble pie, President Uchtdorf.  It is delicious.  Please, may I have another slice?

D&C 64:9-10 “Wherefore, I say unto you, that ye ought to forgive one another; for he that forgiveth not his brother his trespasses standeth condemned before the Lord; for there remaineth in him the greater sin.  I the Lord, will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required to forgive all men.”

My natural man is screaming inside.  I have to forgive no matter what?  No matte the attitude of the wrongdoer?  I have to forgive even when the offending party has not apologized, hasn’t begged and groveled at my feet? I must forgive even when my enemy remains indifferent?  When my foe continues to hiss and spit hatred or unkind words?  I must forgive even when my adversary knowingly and intentionally hurt me knowing full well that he/she was to blame?

Yes.  And one step further – if I don’t forgive, the greater sin is on my head.  Wow.  That is hard.

But, I guess that is the point.  Once again we witness the need for opposition in all things. We have to understand the bitter to appreciate the sweet.

It gets better… Forgiving is only the first step.  When we finally get around to forgiving others, we must forget it as well.  We know that after repentance, the Lord remembers our sins ‘no more.’ Now, we don’t have to send flowers.  We don’t have to hold hands or hang out on the weekend.  We definitely do not have to invite destructive influences back into our lives.  However, we cannot hold onto our negative feelings.  Spencer W. Kimball is pretty much the expert on this subject.  He has a way of expressing forgiveness with the subtlety of a hot iron pressed firmly to one’s face. He said: “Many people, when brought to a reconciliation with others, say that they forgive, but they continue to hold malice, continue to suspect the other party, continue to disbelieve the other’s sincerity.  This is sin”

I know that I have made many, many mistakes.  I have hurt others, and at times I knew that I hurt them, I wanted to.  I also know, that I am sorry, and I want them to forgive and forget and much as I want to forget.  There cannot be a double standard.  I cannot seek mercy and forgiveness of others and look forward to the suffering of those who have hurt me.  I cannot feel the need to withdraw the same level of sympathy that I myself request of so many others.

We can only see and hear the actions and words of others.  We do not know the thoughts, intents, or circumstances of anyone else. That being said, even when we know that someone has intentionally hurt us, we need to give him or her the benefit of the doubt and know that they can change – just like we all can.  I know that I am not the same person that I once was.

WE need to become as little children.  How often has a child come to you in tears, hurt by another, only to be happily playing alongside the same person minutes later as if nothing has ever happened?  It’s too bad we learn how to hold grudges.

Matthew 5:43-45: “Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbor, and hate thine enemy.  But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; That ye may be the children of the Father which is in heaven; for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust.”

3 Nephi 27:27: “Therefore, what manner of men ought ye to be? Verily I say unto you, even as I am.”

Things As They Really Are

23 Sunday Nov 2014

Posted by in Humility, Pride

≈ Leave a comment

A long time ago when I was young(er) and foolish(er) I had a job interview that I can recall with unsettling clarity.  The reasons for which I can remember this interview are varied – and no doubt one of them is so that I can tell this story (so that you can learn to be more wise than me)1  to illustrate my shortcomings and for you to really wonder how on earth someone could act in such a way – ever.  Another reason for my vivid recollection could be to ensure that I learn something (likely many things) from that debacle and to make sure that it is never repeated.

This interview happened to be for a respectable company in Utah and the position was very appealing – especially to a young, recently returned missionary who had a just recently been married, and who was now expected to be the breadwinner for his family by gaining a solid employment to support said family.  This particular position offered  reimbursment for college tuition, as well as a very competitive wage, benefits package, and was very flexible.  Basically, this was a college student’s dream job.

The department supervisor (not the direct supervisor for this position) was someone that knew our family growing up, and had been my primary teacher in earlier years.  The fact that this former teacher of mine would suggest me for a position under his general supervision speaks volumes to his patience and discernment (he knew that I needed his help more than he needed mine), and maybe just a bit to his desire for self inflicted punishment, given the relentless barrage of pre-teen angst and immaturity that he was exposed to week after week in Sunday school.  To this day I wonder how he managed to survive that class.  It must be known here (back to the interview) that my older brother Colby was currently working in this department and had established some credibility and dependence for the Alexander name.

The time for the interview came, and I arrived and went into the supervisor’s office, and there sat the two individuals that I needed to convince.  I needed to convince them that I was the best one for the job, that I was the worker they needed, and that I would bring whatever they were looking for to the table (this is a typical job interview approach right)?  Keep in mind – again – before I describe the train wreck, that I was young(er) and foolish(er) than I am now, and that this was in all reality my very first real job interview ever.  Apparently I had previously convinced myself that the best approach to this interview was to wow them with my abilities, my confidence, and my charisma because what happened has no other explanation.

The one supervisor knew me, and by knowing me, knew a little about what some of my strengths, weaknesses, tendencies, and potential was/were, but the second interviewer (the direct supervisor) did not know me at all, and his only impression(s) of me would be what he gleaned during the interview itself.  He (the one who did not know me) started asking me some questions, and I answered them boldly, confidently, and assuredly telling them that I was the best candidate for this position that they would ever hope to find, even if they searched the whole earth – literally.   Other questions were asked to which I responded in the most self-confident way that there never has been, could be, or would be a better candidate for this or any other job at this company in any department, ever.   At this point, if you asked the supervisor what he thought or how he felt about me (as the candidate) he would likely say something like “well, he is pretty sure of himself, let’s see what he says when I ask him about his weaknesses” – so that’s what he did.  He asked me what some (plural) of my weaknesses were to which I replied frankly “I don’t have any of those”.  This brought a chuckle (likely a nervous, I don’t believe this is really happening but I’ll still giggle due to sheer panic) from my former primary teacher, and a simple smile from the interviewer, but he pressed me and asked a bit more firmly “what do you think some of your weaknesses could be”?  My reply to this day makes me cringe; I said “well, if I had to list a weakness, it might actually be that I don’t have any weaknesses”.

What happened next is easy to guess.  The interviewer said, thank you, indicated that he would let me know and saw me out.  I was (at that point in time) thinking to myself ‘nailed it’.  It wasn’t even until my primary teacher friend asked me if I was crazy (the actual language that he used in not suitable for this blog) that I even thought twice about it.  He then proceeded to give me a lesson on ‘real life’ where it is sort of important to not act like a 7 year old when you are in a job interview.  Then I got nervous. Nervous enough that I started to wonder if ‘who I knew’ and was enough to overcome ‘what I knew’.

It was.  I was miraculously given the job and was able to keep this great job through that tricky college/early family stage.  This proved (for many other reasons) to be a huge blessing in my life that, including some that are still being realized today.  I think I was even able to successfully parlay my childish, immature behavior into an actual strength for the department, and I think I was even able to convince the direct supervisor that I wasn’t a complete idiot….maybe.  I honestly don’t know what he would say about me if you asked him today – or if he will EVER be able to forget my interview.  I think maybe he went against his instinct and really did hire me out of sheer pity hoping for the best.  Or, he might have said something to my friend (the non-interviewer former primary teacher) like one assistant coach said to the other in Rudy (the movie) “if you want him – he’s your problem” thinking to himself that it might be entertaining to watch me explode with incompetence.

The point of telling this story was to highlight a character trait that was lacking at that time – humility.  And, if I’m being completely honest (and I am trying to be) – I think the lack of this trait (in it’s purest and truest form) really was and still is my biggest weakness – or at least one of them.  Somewhere, Dan Morgan is nodding his head in approval of that last sentence (Dan Morgan is the name of the unnamed interviewer above).

I worked at that company for 5 glorious and frustrating years.  My recollection of those 5 years was much more frustrating until about a year ago, when I started to see those years ‘as they really were’. 2 I am able now, to look back at the lessons learned with great satisfaction and intense joy.  I had only missed them before because I wasn’t looking.

My lack of humility sometimes let’s me think that I am pretty hot stuff.  That I am doing pretty darn good, and things are looking up for me.  This pride progressed to the point where (2-3 months ago)  – I was sure and confident in my status that I was ready to see ‘things as they really are’.  This thought occupied my mind for weeks, and I let it consume me until one day when I woke up very early, headed to the temple before work, all the while expecting to see ‘things as they really are’.

What I had in my mind was the veil becoming completely invisible if not removed altogether, allowing me to (as others have) view the beginning from the end in all it’s glory, the heavens and the earth, all the angels on both sides, the sealed records, the lost records, the locations and history of the lost tribes.  I thought I would meet and shake hands with everyone in heaven including all my heroes from the Book of Mormon, chat with the 3 Nephites, have them explain and expound the scriptures to me, essentially viewing anything and everything that I have ever wanted to and go home feeling pretty much satisfied with having achieved my objective which was seeing things as they really are.  That’s a normal expectation right?

The most amazing thing occurred that day, and has continued to occur over the past several weeks.  I have been shown ‘things as they really are’ just like I asked.  I did indeed see things exactly how they really are, things as they have always been, and things as they always will be.  They had always been there; I just wasn’t looking in the right place.  I was looking ‘beyond the mark’. 3 I sat down in the chapel that day (at the temple), for the 5:30 AM session and pleaded again to be shown ‘things as they really are’.

When I opened my eyes, to my disappointment and amazement I saw the organist playing the piano (I was on the very front row not 5 feet from him).  This man – this amazing man – had physical deformities in his hands, and his legs, but had somehow roused himself out of bed pre 5:00 AM, got himself to the temple, dressed himself in his white clothing, and was playing the organ (with the foot pedals) despite the obvious and audible physical pain it caused him.  I saw this amazing man serving prideful people like me, who come to the temple seeking answers, in the truest sense of the word.  I saw him, and immediately knew (and realized) I was receiving a very real answer to my prayer in the very moment is was being offered, because that humble example of Christ-like service, from an anonymous organist, is a very real example of ‘things as they really are’.  I was humbled.

I wish my pride stopped there – it doesn’t, but thankfully, neither do the lessons that the Lord gives me to help keep my pride from running amuck.  I have seen things with my very eyes, that provide me with an ever-burning testimony in my bones of ‘things as they really are’.  I have been shown (per my request) people on my street, in my neighborhood, and in my ward who are literal shining lights in a world of darkness.  Shining lights that I (in my pride) had overlooked previously. I have sat in jr. primary (as a substitute teacher) and heard angel voices singing the most glorious primary songs – and felt the spirit as strongly as when the apostles teach.  I have seen how the simple and weak things of the world are the mightiest of all – because of their humility, and because of the power of the spirit that they invite.  I have seen these people every single week in church, serving, loving, and happy.  I have seen ‘things as they really are’ over and over again – and I love it.

I used to feel like I was pretty hot stuff – but I realized (today again) that in my pride – I exclude myself from the joy and simplicity of truly powerful humility.  This humility is now the strength that I seek.  It allows us to feel closer to our Savior and his atonement, which will in turn lead us closer to others through service.

1 Mormon 9:31

2 See Jacob 4

3 Jacob 4:14